Considering that we've established clearly, that it's vital for wives to carry themselves and act a certain way. I wish to reiterate that every woman should hold her own individually, so as to break the barriers of "motherhood". One might ask about the particulars required in holding your own individually; it's not rocket science to understand how vital confidence and a high level of class, exemplifies a person. You see Ladies, empowerment to reach such a standard, is self- motivated, creating a public understanding of what you're really about. I'm sure by now you're questioning where I am going with this. It's simple; before a woman becomes a wife, she must be a holistic woman, carrying the finite capacity to exude power. Power to activate the desired result without forced effort because, it's who you are.
Hoping that I've opened your minds to a new perspective of a woman, transitioning wife. It's imperative that we examine the other ways, wives unknowingly become mothers to her husbands. Again, dating really does show some signs and some, more compulsive than others. I am very aware that mobile phones connects us all. It's importance has been elevated to equal the air we breath because no matter where we go, there's always people taping away on their phones. Of course, communication is key in staying in the 'know' but a woman must understand her limits. Wives must give their husbands importance but when importance slips into the category of 'need', things can get really dangerous. Men are egotistical creatures, they all possess a certain stratum of ego that craves the right to be understood as 'the man'. That being said, we ought to pet that ego but never to feed it.
Calling or texting to check up on your man every hour of every day is way beyond petting his ego; doing that places you in a mat position, waiting to be walked on. In case you're not aware, doing such a thing does not keep a man in check to stay faithful, it only drives him to desire the unknown, lying in a seemingly more mysterious woman. It couldn't have been less harshly put but we have to face reality that; (a) A husband is a man and it's not your duty as his wife to keep tabs on his every move as if you're his mother expecting a certain behavior from her thirteen year old son. (b) Wives ought to always have a mystique, gaining the thoughts of her husband as to what she's doing and if she's thinking about him; as opposed to being predictable to the point of knowing that when he gets home, 'mom' will be waiting. Get the picture?
If I'm not treding too much on thin ice, there's a scenario that almost every woman would be familiar,- argumentative sound waves; commonly known as raising the voice. I understand that everyone maybe have a different degree of temper but there are more than one ways of skinning a cat. Men can be terrible listeners as well as, they can be very stubborn but we love them anyway. Right? I thought so too, but getting angry does not mean that the children have to hear your voice and God forbid - the neighbors.
As old as I am and trust me, I am not very old, I grasped early that shouting doesn't quite work with men because as they are commonly referred to as 'dogs' (not that I agree with that reference), they do have dog like hearing and they do hear us. They may bring strong arguments back but I assure you ladies, talking down to him like a mother only makes the fight harder. If a man is stubborn, it may very well connote that his mother seeked to always control him and he rebelled the best way he knew how. A different, more sophisticated approach would be to deal with the issue intelligently. Learn your husband enough, to the point where you would know exactly how he'll approach the argument. I would only say here, create calm, articulate well and tie the knot when he's unknowingly given you the answers. That my friend is how you handle things as a wife and it's the only time you should ever feed his ego and mind you, don't hold any thing against him after the conversation. Kiss him, forgive him and be sure to do the little things, that make him always remember that you're his wife and never his mother and don't desire to be.
Painfully, women do crappy things that drive men away. A controlled man isn't a man and never make him into your son. Sometimes, they run back home to mom's house just for peace and more times, in to the arms of another woman who appears less concerned about their well-being and more of a surprise refreshment. I am not saying that we cause infidelity on ourselves but sometimes we create the factors to make it happen. It is important though, to be the wife who keeps her husband's brain working, making him question and putting him in the position of also, petting your egos. Marriage unifies two adults, not a mother and a son. If it were so, he won't cleave to you he will leave you.
Written by:
Drishna Gibson
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